It is Malarkey Monday once again although I do apologize
for last weeks absence.
The net was on the fritz in Australia and I didn’t sleep a wink the night before making a post
close to impossible.
We are all back on track today.
The following video is a bit longer than I wanted but I assure you it is well worth watching.
Sometimes ‘wordplay’ is all you need for a quick morning smile.
Bollocks! (Bull hooks)  

A few pictures to round out the mayhem . . .

*One of the 12 steps for your pooch?

Maybe this is Tony Hawk’s Grandma.
Let”s just hope she has a decent health plan, eh?
Schweet!

Please be sure and visit my fellow Malarkers!
There’s always something more to laugh about.
I promise.
Have a brilliant Monday folks!

Moe
Morky

The following is an actual junk email that had me laughing my ass off.
It was kinda like reading Hemingway on acid.
If all spam was like this, I think I’d actually read more of it.

“The grand piano is single-handledly gentle.
Some eggplant related to a traffic light makes love to a carelessly frustrating rattlesnake, or the hole puncher over a traffic light accidentally borrows money from some paper napkin of a diskette.
A bowling ball daydreams, because a power drill eats the maelstrom about another polygon.
Another highly paid spider buries the college-educated line dancer.
For example, the mitochondrial fraction indicates that a vaporized nation is a big fan of a stovepipe for a dolphin.”

Yeah, weird.

I’ve never been a morning person and don’t think I will ever be.
it usually takes and hour or so and several strong cups of coffee before I’m even semi-lucid.
Hell, I have a tough time deciding between grape jelly or peanut butter for my English muffin.
On days like that I just go with some butter
(maybe a dab or two of vegemite, an Aussie condiment that is slowly growing on me)
This morning I was running a bit late when I got to Boston and stopped at Dunkin’ Donuts for a simple breakfast sandwich.
The girl behind the counter was of oriental persuasion, an important detail as you read the foillowing conversation.

DD: I hep you?

me: yeah, an egg, cheese and ham on a croissant, please.

DD: you want coffee?

me: no.

(DD turns and says something to a co-worker before turning around)

DD: What kind sandwich you want?

me: Egg-Cheese-Ham-Croissant

DD: you want coffee?

me: (louder) NO.

(DD gets called by another co-worker and I’m getting a tad worked up)

DD: What kind of meat you want?

me: HAM!

DD: you want coffee?

me: “for the third and final time, no, I do not want coffee and if I did I would say, “could I please have a cup of coffee?” (muttered under my breath: “Christ-in-a-sidecar”)

Wonder why I never go to DD’s?
(expletives deleted that I refuse to write, but know that there are many)
God, I hate mornings . . .