Browsing all posts in Obama.

Jul 1st
Sunday

john roberts, Obamacare, liberals, WTF?

What Chief Justice John Roberts might have said after recovering from a 3 day bender regarding
*ObamaCare. (the oxymoron in question)
[* side effects include delayed treatment, elevated taxes, swelled deficits, shortages of doctors and
in some cases . . .  Death.]

Smack my ass and call me Sally, Roberts is a Republican, right?
Who knows? Maybe Little Johnny did the GOP a favor.
Time will tell in November.
Or not . . .

May 2nd
Monday

And the angels sang . . .

“Póg mo thóin!”

~m

Jun 21st
Monday

As uncomfortable as this picture makes me feel
THIS makes me feel even more uncomfortable.
And it gets more uncomfortable as the days grow long reading about people
that think they deserve equality and justice.
Will we ever wake up and smell the coffee?
When will we finally call a spade a spade?
From the leviathan Gulf oil spill and Mexican border breaches to the ever-simmering clusterfuck in the Middle East,
I feel doomed somedays, for so many reasons.
Just like today.
Maybe we just haven’t found the answers . . .
Yet.
Got testicles?

~m

***I changed the post picture for the mental stability of my wife

May 18th
Monday

Fred Armisen can out-Barack, Barack.
I thought this was actually quite funny considering Obama is a bigger rock star
than the pretentious Bono of U2 will ever be.
Short clip but funny as all hell.
Yes, Obama is the quintessential King of Cool.
The jury is out as to whether that’s actually cool or not . . .
Hit me up a year from today.

Apr 13th
Monday

*Am I the only one that finds it mildly ironic that Ted “Chappaquiddick” Kennedy
gave the Obama’s a Portuguese Water Dog?
Kennedy supposedly owns three.
Where were they when he needed them?
Wwwwwwoof.

*Here in the US of A we give free needles to junkies and
charge diabetes patients up the wazoo for the same damn needles.
Huh?
Someone pinch me.
I must be dreaming.

*In Massachusetts, I saw a headline today that read –
Study: Tobacco funds not curbing smoking

Turns out that only $13.5 million of the annual $700 million the Baystate receives
was used for smoking cessation programs.
Well, yank my doodle, it’s a dandy.
You gotta be kidding me.
Where’s Nancy ‘MadDog’ Lugosi?


I mean Pelosi.
She’s gotta have a hand in this somehow.
What an ugly woman, inside and out.
And those choppers . . .
Nancy needs to be promoted to ‘Subterranean Truffle Inspector’ tomorrow.
Beech.

*The groundbreaking and intellectually provocative Hannah Montana movie hit theaters over the Easter weekend grossing over 34 million dollars.
For your entertainment ‘bang for the buck’ wouldn’t staying home watching the grass grow be a bit more stimulating?
It’s probably me . . .

*Tiger Woods lost in the final round of the Masters yesterday due to a pair of late bogies.
Why does this not make me feel bad?
I must be a rotten human being.

*And lastly, I thought Gmail’s *new feature ‘Auto-Pilot’ sounded really cool.
But it was only available on April Fool’s Day. {sigh}

Just my mind at play folks . . .

Apr 2nd
Thursday

I wish I was being funny.
I’m in a nasty mood tonight, sorry.
Thomas Jefferson said it best when he said,

“A government BIG enough to give you everything you want, is STRONG enough to take everything you have.”

Fuck the government and all their high paying ‘no-show’ jobs, bullshit posts and meaningless rhetoric.
I have had it.
There is a backstory but you won’t read it here.
Christ in a sidecar . . .
And as far as blogs being taxed, just wait . . .
These assholes will eventually tax excess pubic hair, if  they get their way, and they always do.

God help us all.

Jan 22nd
Thursday

I have no idea what the fine folks at Ben & Jerry’s are smoking these days but they have some of the tackiest advertisements for ice cream that my eyes have ever had the misfortune to read.
The ads are so cutesy they make me want to stir fry a litter of Chihuahua’s.
Well, almost.
I hear they taste just like chicken.
Ice cream in January around here is almost as enticing as a hot cup of soup on the 4th of July.
It just doesn’t make meteorological (or logical) sense.
Like these Ben & Jerry’s ads.
I saw an ad at B&J’s a month or so ago for one of their frozen concoctions called ‘Whirled Peace’.
Ugh.
Gag me with a maggot.
The proverbial turd floating in the crapper was something I happened to notice last Tuesday.
Are you ready?
Get your tie-dye barf bags out.
The flavor du-jour (I didn’t even bother to see exactly what it schwas) was something called, ‘Yes, Pecan’, in honor of the big O’s inauguration.
Yes, Pecan?
You have got to be shitting me.
Lame, lame, lame.
Well, smack my ass an call me Betty, who was the slogan-making machine that penned that one?
They should be brought out to pasture and neutered.
Over the years, slogans have always managed to catch my attention, especially when they’re real bad.
(like B&J’s)
I found a few funny things floating in cyberspace regarding slogans gone over to the dark side:

  • Clairol introduced the “Mist Stick”, a curling iron, into Germany only to find out that “mist” is slang for manure.
  • Colgate introduced a toothpaste in France called Cue, the name of a notorious porno magazine.
  • Coors put its slogan, “Turn it loose,” into Spanish, where it was read as “Suffer from diarrhea.”
  • Scandinavian vacuum manufacturer Electrolux used the following in an American campaign: “Nothing sucks like an Electrolux.”
  • When Gerber started selling baby food in Africa, they used the same packaging as in the U.S., with the beautiful Caucasian baby on the label. Later they learned that in Africa, companies routinely put pictures on the label of what’s inside, since most people can’t read.
  • The Coca-Cola name in China was first read as “Ke-kou-ke-la”, meaning “Bite the wax tadpole” or “Female horse stuffed with wax”, depending on the dialect. Coke then researched 40,000 characters to find a phonetic equivalent: “ko-kou-ko-le”, translating into “Happiness in the mouth.”
  • In Taiwan, the translation of the Pepsi slogan, “Come Alive With the Pepsi Generation,” came out as “Pepsi Will Bring Your Ancestors Back From The Grave” in Chinese.
  • Also in Chinese, the Kentucky Fried Chicken slogan, “Finger-Lickin’ Good” came out as “Eat Your Fingers Off.”
  • Frank Perdue’s chicken slogan, “It takes a strong man to make a tender chicken” was translated into Spanish as “It takes an aroused man to make a chicken affectionate.”
  • When General Motors introduced the Chevy Nova in South America, it was apparently unaware that “No Va” means “It Won’t Go.” After the company figured out why it was not selling any cars, it renamed the car in its Spanish markets to the Caribe.
  • Ford had a similar problem in Brazil when the Pinto flopped. The company found out that Pinto was Brazilian slang for “Tiny Male Genitals.” Ford pried all the nameplates off and substituted “Corcel”, which means horse.
  • When Parker Pen marketed a ballpoint pen in Mexico, its adds were supposed to say, “It Won’t Leak In Your Pocket And Embarrass You.” However, the company mistakenly thought the Spanish word “embarazar” meant embarrass. Instead the ads said that “It Won’t Leak In Your Pocket And Make You Pregnant”

The psychology of slogans fascinates me.
And come to think of it, after reading these, maybe Ben & Jerry’s isn’t so bad after all.
Bite the wax tadpole?
Evyl must have had something to do with that one . . .

Nov 4th
Tuesday


Propaganda, wasteful debates, meaningless answers to the
ad nauseum questions that never got truthfully answered
and now we have to vote?
On what?
Jesus Krispies, I’m really confused on this one.
Time for a write-in?
How about Elvis?
Hmmm . . .

Aug 7th
Thursday

Electile Dysfunction:
Inability to become aroused over any of the choices
for President put forth by either party in the 2008 election year.

{tnks, Lynn!}

Aug 1st
Friday

Someone mentioned this video yesterday and I found it online tonight.
Got several things to say.

#1 - This guy (aka “rapping artist”) has his name right by definition but he spelled it wrong.
#2 – I’ve seen steaming piles of horseshit that have more poetic prowess than this gasbag.
#3 – “Relevant” just doesn’t quite rhyme with “President”, IMHO. Sorry, Luda
#4 - You even irritate Obama. (go figure)
#5 - “So you get off your ass black people, it’s time to get out and vote!” – Ludacris

You be the judge.

Got one thing to say to Ludicris;

End of story.
I rest my case.
The moral of the post?
Get Ray and Stevie to give you political musical props.
You’ll do much better in the long run.
This is pretty funny too . . .

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