Browsing "Angels"

13 years after

9/11, amy jarett, love, life, ISIS

 

It seems like eons ago that I was selling Steinway pianos for a living.
A musician/artist/writer will do just about anything to get by.
It was a gorgeous Tuesday morning on September 11th that I paused outside the door to work.
I looked at the bluer than blue sky, the shining sun, felt the cool but comfortable breeze on my face and thought,
“What a gorgeous day. Sucks but I have to work.”

It was around 8:50am that the phone rang in the store.
I answered it, “Hello, M.Steinert and Sons, how may I help you?”
It was one of our piano tuners calling to tell me he’d just heard on the radio that a passenger plane just flew into
one of the WTC towers in New York.
He thought it was strange and I agreed. We left it at that.
That CAN happen right?

The phone rang again at @9:05.
I answered again.
“Another plane just hit the other tower.”
Same piano tuner, more urgent.
“What the hell, dude,” I said.
It was at that exact moment that the world as I knew it had changed.
We were no longer the invulnerable United States, we were brought to our knees in front of the world.
An attack that could have and should have been avoided.

Are we safer today?
If we are, I don’t feel like we are.
We currently have an administration that has no viable/visible strength, united voice or ultimate power to
condone or publicly defile such despicable acts.
While I’m still ultimately proud to be an American, I fear for all that are out of our international reach.
These days the United States is powerless.
That is a sad truth.
My prayers go out for all those that were lost those 13 years ago.
I will keep Amy Jarret and her family forever in my thoughts.
As we still mourn, we will take comfort in the thought and hope that there’s something better for us out there.
An that maybe someday we will feel safe.

~m

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Aug 28, 2014 - Angels, Birthdays, daughters    2 Comments

Twenty-one

21, love, family, life, birthday

Here she is.
A newborn baby, an angel that never cried; while growing into our lives.
Here she is, a little girl that stole our hearts talking to her baby food.
Here she is, a teenager off to high school with more knowledge than most.
Graduation flows like a river into an ocean of possibility.
Rough seas and dreams that drift ashore lead to distant futures of the good thoughts; the swevens of life.
There she goes, a woman with more dreams and ideas than me and her Mom could ever think of.
Our Hannah is turning 21
We are blessed.
‘God danced, the day you were born’

~m

Letter from Mr. & Mrs. Claus

Christmas, Love, daughters, Santa

 

 

This year will be the first Christmas Eve that two of my daughters will not be at home.
Sarah is working and Jenna will be Christmas ‘Eve’ing many miles away.
Tradition is meant to change, to break apart, so to speak.
It does so on a regular basis and sometimes we don’t even realize it.
When we do we usually don’t like it but ultimately we learn to adapt.
But it makes me think and go all 20/20 is hindsight on my own aging behind.
I start remembering things from many years ago.
Some great, some good, some not so good but still very funny.
Touching moments from the years sometimes bring me to my knees.
After all is said and done, I wouldn’t change a thing.
I like to think that Pamela and I have been a great Mr & Mrs Claus, a great team over the years.
(Truth be told it was mostly her, to be honest. The Mrs. has the spirit in her heart)
We have 3 girls that are slowly making their way in the world.
Reading ‘Twas the Night before Christmas’ has become a thing of the past.
With three girls over the age of 20 it would be weird if we did that these days. Or not. o_O
We might even be labeled  ‘child molesters’ for reading to our own girls or some godforsaken thing.

Huh?

That said, the holiday is upon us and me and the Mrs have some things to say to our
‘not so little anymore’ girls.
(And Santa slowly puts his boots up on the brown corduroy ottoman {covered with a kitty flannel blanket} and adjusts his glasses*)

To Sarah:

On your first Christmas Eve with Jonathan, we wish you both many magical things; softly falling snowflakes, the mysterious sound of sleigh bells in the middle of the night, hoofs on the roof,  a sky full of moonlight, a warm bed {with THE Ironcat} and more Yuletide love than your hearts can hold.
Me and the Mrs. hold you both deeply in our hearts. We hope you know that.
We wish for you both a first Christmas to remember forever.
Don’t worry. I got the ham . . .

 

To Jenna:

Although me and Mrs. Claus won’t see you on Christmas Eve you will be in our hearts.
We wish for you a year of discovery and the acquiring of more knowledge than you will ever be able to use.
We are so proud of what you have accomplished so far and know that you will
complete the complicated task ahead of you.
Our wishes for you and A-Aron are that the Christmas season finds something special for you both.
Some linguica cheese rolls on your trip up to 01501 on Christmas Day will vasty improve your team holiday ratings.
Also, please take some of Nanny’s Christmas Meatballs with you.
A small part of us will be there in NB.

To Hannah
:

Me and Mrs. Claus wish you a Christmas Eve of magic, wonderful music,
bowls of decedent chocolate and a toasty bedtime pillow filled with sugarplum dreams, a snowy ride on the Polar Express and
finally a breakfast plate full of warm French Toast Casserole smothered in maple syrup made by yours truly.
Our baby is now an amazing woman that wears a business suit.
And she is so awesome.
And we are so proud of you.

I’m taking off my glasses now and going to bed.
I will softly wake the sleeping Mrs and guide her upstairs.
Know that we both want all three of you to understand that the Christmas Season is not about stuff but
about love, family, giving, sharing, friends and a love that you give back to yourself every year.
Remember that you will always have a place to call home wherever you are in your life.
That ‘home’ is here in our heart, here in the HOUSE that all three of YOU built.
Me and the Mrs. can’t give you more than that.

To our 3 precious girls . . .
We love you all.
Sleep in the gently falling snowflakes  . . .
Merry Christmas.

Mr. and Mrs. Claus

Thankful

thanksgiving, love, family, turkey, football

 

I am thankful for:

Family;
Pamela, Sarah, Jenna, Hannah, Jonathan and Aaron,
Hedy and George,
my sister Maureen, Billy, Caitlin and Ryan.
Love
Friends (too numerous to mention here. I am blessed)
Music
Faith
Great food (turkey, cheeseburgers, crockpot, BBQ, steak, anything that swims, chicken, pork roast, and on and on)
Blue skies
Poetry
Cigars
Pipe tobacco
Rain
Picasso
Dali
Hopper
Miles, Coltrane, Parker, Sample, Ray Charles, Leon Russell, Steely Dan, Michael McDonald, Marc Jordan, Steve Khan, Tom Scott, Take 6
Chick Corea, Bill Evans, Chopin, Brubeck, Oscar Peterson, Joplin and on and on
NH, and mountains, maple syrup and Zeb’s
Australia, snags, pull-a-parts, meatpies, Bundy, the Southern Cross, grilled venison in Stick’s Mancave, chinese croc, Pavlova
Didgeridoos and bullwhistles
Moe, Mark, Tash, Stick, Stella, Max, Issac, Will, Kel, Ant, Zoe, Mel, Steve, Caleb, Lucas, Taylor, Jack and all our Aussie family
the Pats, Red Sox, Bruins, Celtics and the NE Revolution
Harrison’s Roast Beef
Wright’s Chicken Farm
Ronnie’s on a sunny summer day
The College of the Holy Cross
Assumption College
Bryant University
Everyday that I am alive
my own music and the knowledge that it came from somewhere high above
Sleep
Church on Sunday and another chance to do good
every day that I wake up
my Guardian Angel (she’s always busy)
My list could/should go on but I will stop here.
Please leave me one thing that you are thankful for.
That would be nice.
Happy Thanksgiving to all.
I will be away from FB for the next few days because I will be cooking.
Alot.
Much peace to all.
~m

Boston Strong

anguish, Boston, Marathon

When I got into Boston on Monday morning I took a different route walking to work.
I usually slip out the ass end of Back bay station and walk through the alleys and quiet streets to Park Square
but today was Marathon Monday and a great day to walk through Copley Square on my way to work.
The sun was shining, the temps were comfortable and runners were everywhere running for buses to take them to
the Marathon starting line in Hopkinton.
Walking through Copley I saw hundreds of palettes of spring water,
King’s Hawaiian Sweet rolls, pretzels, Smart Food, Vitamin Water and on and on.
People working in the many tents along Boylston Street were obviously happy to be there as they went about their preparations.
There was a palpable lilt in the air that could not be denied.
We all hate Mondays but Marathon Monday in Boston is pretty damn cool for many damn reasons.
I also remember thinking how awful it would be were something catastrophic to happen.

 

At 2:55PM, a woman came in for some rolling tobacco and asked if I’d heard the ‘bangs’.
She was wondering if they were firing cannons for Patriots Day.
I told her I hadn’t heard a thing.
I was alone in the store and went to Google after she left.
I typed in: Boston Marathon 2013 /Bombs
I came up with 2 results.
Links to a few runners’ websites that simply said;
“unconfirmed reports of two explosions at the finish line of the Boston Marathon.”
The links would not open

Bullshit, I thought.
Not here.
Not today.
Not in Boston.

10 minutes later the city was cracked open like an over ripe pomegranate.
Sirens, police cars, ambulances too many to count,
unmarked cars with blue flashing lights and a feeling of dread as I watched thousands of people dripping their way towards South Station.
Most were crying; some were simply distant with no facial expression at all.
You know the rest of the story; probably more so than CNN, a current font of reporting mediocrity.

I took a walk around 4PM yesterday and went down to the corner of Berkeley and Boylston Street.
National Guard would not let you go any further as everything was blockaded.
It was a big crime scene.
I looked down at a usually frantic Copley Square that now seemed post-apocalyptic, empty and dreadfully silent. My heart broke just a bit as more reality drained into my psyche.
It was not unlike a scene from ‘Walking Dead’ or ‘I am Legend’.
The word ‘nothing’ came to mind.
I watched paper and debris flying through the air looking to get out of the dead space that was Copely.

That’s how my eyes saw it and my brain interpreted it.
It made no logical sense to me.
Still doesn’t.

On my way back to Park Square I noticed the omnipresent media camped out at the corner of Arlington and Boylston. It seemed to me to be a media freak show/ circus with bright lights and cameras going while reporting half myths and hearsay from who the fuck knows.
Homeless people were probably contributing their stories and ideas. (they may have been closer to the truth than CNN, ffs)

I am a Bostonian and I love this city. (Even though I live in the burbs)
I went to school here and currently work here and no one will ever take away the fact that this place was built on guts, strength, love, and a work ethic like no other place in the world.
This IS my backyard.
Sadly, the landscape has changed, for now . . .
Know that We are Boston.
We are Many.
And We are Pissed.
But I have a good feeling that many beautiful flowers will blossom this same time next year.
Because that’s how we roll . . .

~m

ps. Photo courtesy of John TLumacki, Boston Globe

Shamrocks

It is on this day that I think about my Mom and Dad.
Saint Patrick’s Day would find my mother in the kitchen cooking her corned beef and cabbage.
And God help you if you didn’t stop by for a plate and a pint.
I miss them both dearly on this day but know in my heart they are here with me as I serve my own
a dish they both dearly loved.
Danny Boy is for me Mum.
Miss you, Ginny.
Blessed be Ireland and all those from County Cork. [my roots]
~m

Dec 8, 2012 - Angels, Christmas, Life, Love, Pamela    3 Comments

Lucky

lucky, family, love, Christmas, life

 

If you’re lucky enough, there’s a person in your life that makes everything easier;
they hurt when you hurt, they cry when you cry, they laugh when you laugh.
If you’re lucky enough, there’s a person whose soul sees what you see,
understands, accepts and agrees to the crazy thoughts and ideas that you hold dear and true.
Even though you’re still totally nuts0.

If you’re lucky enough,
there’s a person in your life that you just can’t live without because they make you see
the good and bad that resides in your heart changing you for the better, always for the better.
If you’re lucky enough, there’s a person in your life that never gives up on you,
never gives up on your dreams and never stops loving you no matter how much you screw up.
And I screw up on a daily basis.

And finally, if you’re really lucky enough, there’s a person in your life that never let’s you down,
is always there when you need a hug and never let’s you forget that you are so loved,
no matter how much of a creative screwball you really are.
I am one of the lucky ones.
Jingle my bells.
I think . . .
~m

29+

love, Pamela

 

It was 29+ years ago that I married my best friend.
29 years ago that my world changed because I found something that
some never do, someone that understood me sometimes better than myself,
someone who has never let me down and someone who has made this thing called life worth living.
I have 29,000+ reasons for loving her with more reasons by the day.
29+ years ago I didn’t think I could ever love her more.
I love it when I’m wrong.
This Winnie the Pooh quote sums ‘us’ up to a T:
“If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you.”
There’s a quiet forest that lives in my heart.
If you look long and hard enough you will find an oak tree that is older than any other tree in the forest.
If you look closely you will see a heart.
Inside the heart is inscribed: “I love Pamela Chesna
It was written before we ever met. I know this much to be true.
And to this day that oak tree continues to grow . . .
Happy 29+, Pamel
Always . . .

~m

When tomorrow comes

love, family, Alzheimer's Disease, memory

 

I read a post on Facebook from a ‘friend’ tonight.
I have no idea if he wrote it or found it on the interwebz.
That said, it moved me to tears reminding me of my Mom and Dad’s struggle with Alzheimer’s.
It’s called ‘When Tomorrow Starts Without Me’ and is a simply beautiful epitaph and message of hope that should be shared.
I’m missing my Mom and Dad tonight the way they used to be . . .  more than usual.
I’m over remembering the bad stuff.
Moving on.
Please share this . . .
Thank you, JohnD for posting!

UPDATE 8.6
attributed to David M Romano


When tomorrow starts without me
And I’m not there to see;
If the sun should rise and find your eyes
All filled with tears for me.
I wish so much you wouldn’t cry
The way you did today;
While thinking of the many things
We didn’t get to say.

I know how much you love me
As much as I love you;
And each time that you think of me,
I know you’ll miss me too.
But when tomorrow starts without me
Please try to understand,
That an angel came and called my name
And took me by the hand.

She said my place was ready
In heaven far above;
And that I’d have to leave behind,
All those I dearly love.
But as I turned to walk away,
A tear fell from my eye;
For all my life, I’d always thought
I didn’t want to die.

I had so much to live for,
So much yet to do;
It seemed almost impossible,
That I was leaving you.
I thought of all the yesterdays,
The good ones and the bad;
I thought of all the love we shared,
And all the fun we had.


If I could relive yesterday
Just even for awhile,
I’d say goodbye and kiss you
And maybe see you smile.
But then I fully realized
That this could never be;
For emptiness and memories
Would take the place of me.

And when I thought of worldly things
I might miss come tomorrow;
I thought of you, and when I did,
My heart was filled with sorrow.
But when I walked through heaven’s gates
I felt so much at home;
When God looked down and smiled at me
From His great golden throne.

He said, “This is eternity
And all I’ve promised you;
Today your life on earth is past,
But here it all starts anew.”
“I promise no tomorrow,
But today will always last;
And since each day’s the same day,
There’s no longing for the past.”
“But you have been so faithful,
So trusting and so true;
Though at times you did do things,
You knew you shouldn’t do.”
“But you have been forgiven
And now at last you’re free;
So won’t you take my hand
And share my life with me?”

So when tomorrow starts without me,
Don’t think we’re far apart
For every time you think of me,
I’m right here in your heart.


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