I really like Teavana, I really do but the over the top selling drives me over the edge.
These guys are worse than car salesmen, for cripes sake.
This is the conversation we have everytime we go to a Teavana store:
Me: Hi. I’d like 6 ounces of English Breakfast tea.
TeaHeads: Would you like to try our new Exotic Iced Tea Collection?
It’s only $69.95 and it’s wonderful for this time of the year!
Me: No, thanks. Just 6 ounces of English Breakfast.
TeaHeads: We have this wonderful Monkey Picked Oolong tea for $25.00. That’s for 2 ounces. Soooo good and good for you!
Me: Could I just get the 6 ounces of English Breakfast, please?
TeaHeads: (almost defeated) Yes, sir . . . (30 seconds later) 9 ounces okay?
Me: No. I wanted 6. I could have the Monkey come back there and weigh it out, if you want.
TeaHeads: *grimace* 7 ounces okay?
Me: Let’s try this one more time to see if you’ve been listening, okay?
6 ounces of English Breakfast tea.
Not 8, not 6 1/2, not 5 but 6.
1,2,3,4,5,6 god damned ounces of tea!
I did employ some literary hyperbole on this but it’s pretty damn close to what happens every single f*&^%#g time.
One of these days I’m not going to say anything and just go behind the counter and weigh my own tea.
I’ll be the flying monkey holding the steaming cup of Oolong and a smoldering cigar . . .
ps. the .gif image in this post reminded me of my wife and her infinite love of tea