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It was August of 2005 when I wrote this post.
Since then my life has flown by me at a rate faster than a hummingbird’s wings in flight.
Labor Day weekend I’ll be moving in not one, but two daughters into college.
This will be Sarah’s senior year while Jenna will be a freshman.
Both of them are excited for a variety of reasons, though there’s a slight bit of trepidation on Jenna’s part, with butterflies of the unknown creating havoc on her nerves.
Sarah has been there, done that, and bought the t-shirt (and the socks, and the sweatpants, and the coffee mugs, and the baseball hats).
It’s a year she’s worked incredibly hard to get to and it’s one that will undoubtedly be emotional when it comes to an end. Pamela and I consider most of her friends extended family.
For Jenna, this is new territory. I can tell she’s excited though as she watches her pile of stuff growing in the living room next to Bob.
My life is once again undergoing a significant change as the “soundtrack” of our house changes.
There’s nothing I’m trying to figure out here and no tears to wipe (yet) but I wanted to put a timestamp on this time in my life.
Even if I could slow it down, I probably wouldn’t.
That would be like locking the door on two precious lives thirsting for self-discovery, knowledge and ultimately their independent happiness.
I could never do that.
Maybe I just wanted to write how much I already miss the both of them.
The kitchen door just won’t be opening and closing as much.
Laundry will be lighter.
Dirty water bottles in the sink will be virtually non-existent.
The two thousand pairs of sneakers and sandals that now litter the first floor will be rendered invisible.
I want to think that life will get simpler but it won’t.
And that’s okay because I know in my heart that they’ll be okay.
And I’ll use the bathroom whenever I want to.
Maybe.
Anyway you look at it, I’m going to miss them.
As I always do.
I figure it won’t be long until I write a post that starts,
“It was August of 2008 when I wrote this . . . ”
In the meantime, life will go on,
and our old backdoor will remain forever open . . .
Aww, I imagine that was an interesting time in your life that made you stop and consider how it all felt. It sure was a lot to take in. I’m glad you re-posted it because I missed it the first time. It is nice to see the male perspective as all I’ve ever really seen has been the female. It’s also important to remember that empty-nest syndrome affects men as well as women. It’s a life change for anyone, no matter what the gender.
although both of mine were away at school last year, they were both within about 90 minutes. and had cars. i saw a lot of them on weekends… but over time, it slows down… and my empty nest – which is the family home i shared with their dad, my children and a menagerie of critters, just didn’t feel right for me and the brown dog.
it was too quiet.
so i’m moving. starting over in the “party girl” condo. um, in about 2 weeks. yikes… back to packing…
but great idea to capture the feeling. time stamp it. and hit replay a few years down the road…
Strange how we celebrate and mourn at the same time isn’t it? So proud of them for their achievments, yet melancholy because it heralds a new stage that represents their growing up that little bit more.
It’s the bitterweet tatse of being a parent my friend, as you know. It never gets any easier either. Even after 34 years I’m not accustomed to it, so I know exactly how you feel
{{{hugs}}} for you…it doesn’t help, I know, but sometimes it’s nice to know others empathise just the same…
I just went to your backdoor and it is LOCKED!
Life, it moves forward!
Yes, it won’t be long at all. I can’t believe how the past year has flown by. The quickest for sure.
I had read that post before, though I guess I did not comment. It was readable again, though.
How much can happen in 3 short years and don’t you find the years themselves get shorter and shorter? I swear it was only St. Patrick’s Day a few weeks ago. Are we getting old, or is the earth merely spinning faster (and out of our control)?
I loved the image of all the shoes on the first floor. The detritus of life can often have meaning.
Kat
My goodness, my daughter is still an infant and my heart hurts reading that. Letting her go and grow up, moving out and moving on… they grow up so fast and I’m doing all I can to savor every little minute.
Beautiful post, M.
You described the bittersweetness of the moment (and those thereafter) perfectly and honestly. I love the sensitive nature of your writing….
They’ll never be far away…….always in your heart!
Thank goodness college is close by. Weekends are wonderful!
Enjoy every minute! It can change in an instant!
You’ll always be their dad. I hope they both enjoy their important years at college.
Howdy Michael…
i’m with you on the time stamp – i often do the same thing with my splatters and smears.
my younguns are aged 7 and 17… so i reckon i might just be over the first fledgeling flight, when i’m faced with the next one.
i dread the silence… creeping into the empty spaces like a fungus, spreading their scent of desertion.
for now – i’m just loving them… when i dont want to shake/deport them!